


Trying Friendship

by khughes830



Category: The West Wing
Genre: Episode Tag, Episode: s05e22 Memorial Day, F/M, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2005-07-25
Updated: 2005-07-25
Packaged: 2019-05-30 09:43:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,149
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15094136
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/khughes830/pseuds/khughes830
Summary: Josh is met at the airport by Amy after returning from Germany





	Trying Friendship

**Author's Note:**

> A copy of this work was once archived at National Library, a part of the [ West Wing Fanfiction Central](https://fanlore.org/wiki/West_Wing_Fanfiction_Central), a West Wing fanfiction archive. More information about the Open Doors approved archive move can be found in the [announcement post](http://archiveofourown.org/admin_posts/8325).

   


 

**Trying Friendship**

**by: Kathleen**

**Character(s):** Josh, Donna, Amy  
**Pairing(s):** Josh, Donna  
**Category(s):** Romance  
**Rating:** TEEN  
**Disclaimer:** Not mine, not mine, not mine. Feel free to sue if you like, but it would be a waste of your time since you all have more pocket change than I have in my checking account!  
**Summary:** Josh is met at the airport by Amy after returning from Germany  
**Author's Note:** I've been very hateful to Amy Gardner in the past, thinking that she is the spawn of Satan and what-not, but now that Bravo is in the middle of Season 3 during the 6PM hour (for those of us in the Central Time Zone), my resolve has soften just a TOUCH and I really do like Mary Louise Parker as an actress! So, for once, I decided to write a nice Amy fan fic. Enjoy! 

He was completely exhausted when he exited the plane at National Airport. Since he had no real luggage to pick up, he continued toward the exit. His backpack was now accompanied by a small carry-on bag that held the contents of his life while at her bedside in Germany. He didn't want to leave, he hated the fact that he had to leave. He held her while she cried and then he, himself, had cried in the cab on the way to the airport. He wasn't sure when he was going to see her again and that was crushing him. He swore that he would call her everyday, no matter what. She told him that she wouldn't hold him to that, since he was going to be busy with the summit at Camp David, but he promised her on his life that he would call her every day. 

He trudged through the concourse in a daze. He wasn't even sure what time it was – his biological clock was all messed up. He didn't even remember when the last time was he had a good night's sleep. He napped during the day in the Moss' hotel room while they visited with Donna. He insisted on staying with her at night. The nurses said that that wasn't hospital policy, but he pulled out the White House card. It was only after Colonel Leahy spoke with the nurses did they leave him alone about spending the night. 

He sighed as the turned the corner toward the exit. He had barely heard the noises around him as he walked through the food court area toward the exits. But, he managed to hear his name being shouted. 

"Josh!" 

He turned and saw her, sitting at a table at the little coffee shop in the center of the concourse. In front of her sat two steaming cups of coffee, one bottle of water and one large sandwich. 

He walked over to her, dropped his bags on the floor next to the table and collapsed into the chair. 

"Hey Amy. What are you doing here?" 

"Liz Bartlet called. She told me she had heard from the President that you were flying back today so I just thought… well…". 

She just smiled at him and he smiled back. She was trying to be a friend, he could see that. He couldn't remember the last time they had been very nice to each other, but he could see that she was trying and he could appreciate that today. 

"Thanks. What's all this?" he said, motioning to the food and coffee. 

"Well, I didn't know when the last time was you would have had anything real to eat, so I thought you might be hungry." 

"Thanks" he said as he wearily bit into the sandwich and took a long drink from the water. They sat in silence as he ate and she sipped her coffee. He didn't realize how hungry he was until he finished the sandwich nearly as soon as he began eating it. She just watched him as he wiped his mouth and took a sip of the coffee. 

"How is she?" 

"Alright, considering. I mean, I'm no doctor, but Colonel Leahy said she came through the surgery very well. She's struggles, she hates being confined to the bed, apparently her mother is driving her completely crazy – Donna says all she does is stare at her while she's there." Amy could see it in his face – saying her name out loud made it real – that he was here and she was there. He fell apart in front of her face. He laid his head down on the table and sighed. 

"Josh…" 

"I didn't want to leave. I don't know why I didn't want to leave, or why I hopped a plane in the first place, but it's just…" 

"I know why J." 

He looked up at her. He had half expected to see hate and venom in her eyes, but he saw compassion and friendship and this surprised him. 

"Why then?" 

"Really, J, you really need me to spell it out for you." 

He sighed. "No, not really." 

She smiled at him. "Good then." 

"Look, Amy, it's not like there is anything going on, or that there has been anything going on…" 

"I know, Josh." 

"She's practically my best friend. She's stood by me through a ton of shit – like through everything with Carrick over the winter – and I just…" 

"Josh, please. I'm a smart woman. Are you really, REALLY, going to try to play the 'friend' card with me of all people?" 

He knew that most people would buy into it, especially everyone at the White House. No one really wanted to see it, wanted to tell him differently, for fear of what it would mean and what it would do. But Amy, he knew, had always seen through the façade. 

He gave her a small smile. "I guess not. You really aren't one to buy into bullshit are you?" 

She smiled at him back. "Never have been, don't know why you would think I would start now." 

He stared at the top of the coffee cup and twirled it around in his hands on the table top. He wasn't sure where else to go with this conversation, but he knew he wanted to continue, to talk to someone about this that would listen and not judge. He was just surprised that this person was about to be Amy Gardner. He was about to open his mouth and continue, but she beat him to it. 

"You know she loves you too right?" 

He just stared at her like she had revealed the launch code secrets to the Taliban. 

"You don't know that, Amy." 

"Oh, but I do, dear Joshua, I do." 

"How could you know that?" 

"She never told you." 

"That she loves me? No, I'm pretty sure I would remember that!" 

Amy just gave him her 'you idiot' look. "About the night Zoey was kidnapped." 

"What in the world are you talking about?" 

Amy adjusted in her seat and took a long sip of coffee before beginning. "The night that Zoey was kidnapped, while you were with Charlie, I came over to leave Donna a note about the Wellingtons, that they were back on and we needed something. She was still there, so we ended up talking and drinking a couple of beers. You were mad at me for my stupid, off-hand comment about Hoynes and I guess I wanted some answers about, well, you, and I figured that I could get it out of Donna. Then she said something that kind of caught me off guard. She said that I had to 'get' you to understand." 

She noticed that Josh was on the edge of his seat, listening to this story. She thought it was cute that he was this interested in something Donna had said over a year ago. 

"Anyway, I saw something when she said that. She tried to backtrack, to cover herself, but it was clear as day. So I asked." 

"Asked what?" 

"I asked 'are you in love with Josh?'. She stood there, with her back to me, frozen. When she turned and looked at me, I could see it in her eyes. It was like all it took to unlock all that stuff she had managed to quash was for someone to ask the question. Anyway, she fell into her chair and, if I recall correctly, said 'it doesn't matter. I won't do anything to put his career in jeopardy and… well… me and feelings would distract him. I won't do that to him.' She said she had never admitted that to anyone. I promised to keep it to myself. I was about to give her some advice, but her phone rang and my pager went off at the same time, and… well, you know how the rest of it went." 

He stared at her with wide eyes. "You knew that she… then why… why did we… why did we start up again, if you knew?" 

Amy just sighed. "That was a mistake on my part. I knew I should have walked away that day in your office, but I just couldn't help myself. You put a challenge on the table, but remember there, J, you are the one who kissed me, not the other way around." 

He ran his hands back and forth through his hair. "Yeah, I know. That's when she started… started to pull away… when we… oh man." 

He looked at Amy and he could see the regret in her eyes. "I know, J, I know, and I feel awful about that. I tried to talk to her, tried to make her see, especially after I left, but with the shutdown and then the Brussels trip and the CODEL, I never got to actually talk to her, more than just leaving her messages. I do feel bad, regardless of what everyone thinks about me. I do have feelings and I know when I cross a line. I'm disappointed in myself, especially since I knew that you felt the same way." 

"Amy, I…." 

"I'm not stupid, Josh. I knew, but, back then, I didn't care. You were who you were, I was who I was, you were so cute and it made sense in my head. I knew I could ignore the rest, but it wasn't fair to Donna, who did nothing wrong but fall in love with a great guy. That's why it was hard for you to come back. I can imagine you, sitting by her bed, willing her to wake up and do that whole banter thing that you two do. That's probably when you figured it out." 

"She has a guy who visited. Colin something, he's…" 

"J, I would imagine he's the male version of me, Donna's version of Amy Gardner." 

"What do you mean?" 

"J, she's trying. Even half a world away, in a hospital bed, she's trying to turn off what she feels for fear of what it may do to you. She's so scared of screwing up your life that she is trying…" 

"To move on? To get over me?" 

"Quite possibly, she's just trying to see if any of that is possible. I could tell her that she's just wasting her time, but it would be pointless. Until she's willing to see it, there will be no talking to her." 

"Is that what I was doing… what I was doing with you?" 

"Pretty sure." 

He sighed and she could see guilt wash over his face. 

"J, there's nothing to feel bad about. I'm a big girl and I knew what I was getting into, especially the second time around." 

"What's that mean 'especially the second time around'?" 

"J, a person would have to be blind and deaf not to see and know that you and Donna have a very different relationship. I had my suspicions the first time we were together – especially the night of Mrs. Bartlet's birthday party, how you kept worrying about Donna, even as we danced. I did my best to ignore the early morning phone calls from my living room and the looks and the way you two were just – well, the way you two just were." 

"Would you believe you aren't the first person to say that, to make that observation?" 

"Not at all." 

That made him laugh and she was glad to see that he could still smile after everything that had happened over the last month, hell – over the last year. 

She got out of her chair and started gathering up the garbage to throw it away. 

"Amy, why did you come here? Why did you want to meet my plane?" 

She threw the garbage in a nearby can and turned to look at him. "Well, there were two reasons. First – the last two weeks have probably been hell on you. I thought you could use a friend, or at least a friendly face. The second was that I was ordered to make sure you got sleep before heading to the summit tomorrow." 

He smiled. "Talk to Abbey, did you?" 

"She called right after Liz and I hung up. Said that Leo and the President were going to need you well rested for all of this. So, let's get the hell out of here." 

Amy picked up his backpack and slung it over her shoulder as Josh grabbed the small carry-on case. They walked shoulder to shoulder out of the airport toward parking. 

"Amy, my car's at the White House." 

"No, it's here. I drove it." 

"What… how…" 

"Yeah, I'll never understand how you managed to remember to grab your laptop but left your car and house keys sitting in the desk drawer. I took a cab to the White House and drove from there." 

"You really are brilliant." 

"With legs that go all the way down to the floor, don't forget." 

"How could I" he said with a laugh. 

He slung his left arm over her shoulder has they walked toward his car. 

She popped the trunk and put his stuff in the back as he collapsed in the passenger side seat. She started up the car and made her way out of the parking structure. As she made the turn to head toward Georgetown, she looked over at him and noticed he seemed a world away. 

"She'll be fine, Josh." 

"It's so hard, not being there. I about told Leo to blow it out his ass when he told me I had to come out. About faxed him my resignation letter right then from the hospital. She actually talked me out of it. She woke up as I was writing the damn thing. She asked what I was writing and I told her. Even drugged up and just out of surgery, she was taking care of me and helping me along. How she managed to do that, I'll never know. She said that I should come back and work, to make sure that some good comes out of this bullshit. I told her the only way I was coming back was if we talked at least once a day and if she allowed me to talk to Colonel Leahy about how she's recovering and that if something happens, that I would be on the next plane. She agreed without much of a fight, which is how I could tell she wasn't completely with it. Anyway, I told Leo the only way I was coming back is if I had the freedom to leave if she took… well, if…" 

"You don't have to say it Josh. I know." 

She could tell that he was choking back tears. Since it was early in the day, Amy was able to find a spot right in front of the townhouse. He grabbed his bags from the back and she grabbed her briefcase from behind the driver's seat. They trudged up the step and through Josh's front door. Amy went to set up her stuff on the coffee table as she noticed Josh leaning against the wall just inside his door. 

"Josh…" 

He slid down the wall and hung his head between his knees. "Amy, what am I going to do if… if she… what happens if…" 

Amy shot off the couch and sat in front of him. "Josh, I know Donna is famous for her rules, so I decided that I would try a few of my own. Just one, actually. Only positive thinking when it comes to Donna. Playing the 'what-if' game will only make you, everyone, crazy. Donna's a fighter. She would have to be the strongest person in the world to deal with you for the last 6 years." 

She noticed that made him chuckle. 

"Deep down, she knows that you love her and she loves you. That's going to make her fight even more. So, here's what you are going to do. You are going to get up, take a shower, burn that suit, and call Donna. After that, sleep." 

Amy stood up and extended both hands to help him off the floor. He gave her a hug before heading toward the bedroom. She sat down on the couch and pulled some files out of her briefcase when she heard her name. 

"Hey, Amy." 

She looked up to see him staring at her from the bedroom door. 

"I just… well, I really appreciate… I just wanted to say thanks. You meeting me today…" 

"I was nothing, J. I wanted to. You needed a friend today, and, believe it or not, I think that we just might be good at that." 

He gave her a small smile and she returned him the favor. "Who'da thunk that?" 

She laughed. "No kidding. Now go, really, you smell like planes. It's not attractive." 

He laughed as he turned toward the bathroom. She sat there and waited until she heard the shower start. She knew he was going to be a bear without Donna around – everyone had come to this realization as soon as the news started reporting about the bombing. As much as she had hoped that Josh would love her as much as she thought she had loved him at one point, she could see that there was no point in standing in the way of what fate had destined for Josh and Donna. She wanted to try to be his friend at least, be an ear when he needed to vent and talk about Donna. She had called him on it all those years ago, so she figured that she could be the best sounding board for him until he was able to be with Donna again. Trying to be friends was nothing they had ever tried before, but she had decided that day, the day of the bombing, that Josh deserved happiness with Donna and she wanted to help him get that. That's what friends do – they help each other through good times and bad.


End file.
